Mud Pack

What's the first thing you think of when someone mentions the word "fezzie"? Mud? Well done, you've read my mind. Glastonbury or Reading, whatever the event, it makes absolutely no difference whatsoever that most of these performing arts / music festivals will be a weathertastic wash-out. Perhaps we should start holding them in Winter as it's sod's law that we'll get warm, sunny weather in the middle of January. Cornbury is a small place quite close to 'the historic village Woodstock' in Oxfordshire and it is in this very same location that The Cornbury Music Festival is held. It's a two day event with emphasis on a family orientated type vibe which means children of all ages are catered for, making for a very civilised but fun atmosphere. You could say it's different from The Bulldog Bash (roaring Harleys and greasy strippers), but where Cornbury wins out is the sheer variety of music acts they have on the bill. The second day included appearances by Joe Bonamassa, 10cc, KT Tunstall and headliners for the main stage, Crowded House. Unfortunately, I never paid much attention to any of these as I was too busy recovering from Saturday. But that's ok, 'cos it was worth it.

So, it's a weekend of camping with entertainment which means you need a camper van or a tent. If you can't be bothered with either, you can even hire a teepee or a Mongolian style yurt to live for the duration of the course. Looking back on our rain soaked and leaking tent it may be a wise idea to rent one of those next time. Facilities on the site were adequate, there was a separate family camping area, showers (mostly cold, but invigorating), lots of food stalls and even the chemical flushing toilets were bareable. Oh yes, technology's come along way since Glasto '90 - I still have nightmares about having to force myself to sit down in a 'filled' cubicle to find myself horrendously 'tickled' by someone else's feces. Imagine what that's like when you're sober? Urgghhh!

Congratulations must go to the team from The Word magazine for organizing Saturday's line up on the second stage. Unfortunately, I missed The Love Trousers, a band featuring Word editor Mark Ellen, so I can't tell you what they're like. I'm sure they had a good time though, as Mr Ellen was spotted later that night drunkenly shouting a request for "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" to covers band Brainchild in the Cornbury tent. Tsk, tsk, disgraceful hack.

It was an unusually early spot for The Beat to come onstage (12.30pm), and I did wonder if this was the actual ska Beat that I know and love - I would've thought they would be on at a later time as they have a knack of warming up a crowd with the greatest of ease. Perhaps they were the warm up band for Half Man Half Biscuit? The 2008 Beat features a few line up changes, namely Mickey Billingham (ex Dexy's Midnight Runners keyboard player) and Ranking Junior (Roger's son) on toasting duties but original members Ranking Roger and drummer Everett Moreton were there enjoying every minute of their time on stage, and when a band are enjoying themselves, then so will the audience likewise with their particularly infectious dance tunes that get so many punters up on their feet. An effortless crowd pleasing set was augmented by a twenty minute encore due to a timing confusion, but no one complained. "Stand Down Margaret / George / Gordon", "Mirror In The Bathroom", "Tears Of A Clown", "Too Nice To Talk To" - they did them all. Top marks.

Half Man Half Biscuit, the third band on The Word stage, were an addition to the bill which swung it for me. If you're not familiar with them, they're a Tranmere Rovers supporting bunch from The Wirral who write the most lyricially humourous songs out there, which is why you can forgive their lack of polished musicality. A HMHB gig is about fun and these boys were on good form. They played some of their newer stuff like "Took Problem Chimp To The Ideal Home Show" (a live debut for that one), "Blue Badge Abuser", "Evening Of Swing" and "Petty Sessions" from their recent album CSI:Ambleside as well as "Corgi Registered Friends", "Restless Legs", "For What Is Chatteris" and "Joy Division Oven Gloves" from Achtung Bono and personal favourite "Running Order Squabble Fest" brought a big cheesy grin to my face. "Trumpton Riots" was served up as an encore for the old, faithful fans and then they were gone. No "All I Want For Christmas Is A Dukla Prague Away Kit" this time, perhaps when the Biscuits play London in October we'll get to hear it. To be fair though, it was a very pleasing set list which was lapped up by the audience. I feel a HMHB podcast coming on...

Sauntering towards the main stage where The Bangles performed an identical set to the one they churned out the weekend before at Hyde Park. Saves me doing another review on them, although they did do a better version of "Mrs Robinson", quite cheeky of them since Paul Simon was headlining the main stage later that night. I like cheeky. And I like Susanna Hoffs, but you already knew that, didn't you?

Back to The Word stage for Carbon / Silicon who also played at the Hard Rock Calling event of last Sunday. When I first listened to their songs I wasn't overly impressed, but I have warmed to them just by seeing them twice in quick succession. They're another live act with a 'feel good factor' about them, all cheeky smiles and enjoyment. Couple that with loud, raucous guitar and it's no wonder that Alan McGee described them as "sounding like The Stones jamming with a laptop". They give away their music for free and make their money on gigs, that's the music revolution right there. Pay 'em a visit, squire.

During all this, I also listened to two songs worth of Toots & The Maytals (adequate), queued up for half an hour just for a coffee as Paul Simon played, tried and failed to get a fiver off a bowler hat at a clothes stall (would you pay £25 for a Chinese made bowler?) and I got soaked because of the rainfall. We even went as far as buying a portable flushing toilet prior to this festival attendance, when we should've invested in waterproof clothing and tents instead. Special mention goes to Nick Lowe for a classy set of knockout numbers, it's great to see an entertainer of his ilk at an event like this and an ideal headliner for the second stage.

As I mentioned earlier, Sunday was a day of rest and recouperation which was spent drying out in The Word tent and drinking healthy and delicious smoothies as 10cc played their lullabies in the background. As for Joe Bonamassa; technically he's a good player but I do wonder where his 'feel' went or wether he had any to start off with. Crowded House? We were too busy with a crowded tent to bother with them (2 berth my arse).

If you want to go to an easy going yet very pleasant festival with great acts, I'd recommend Cornbury. If you want to get absolutely blotto on illegal substances, stick to the dodgy unadvertised fezzies that you'll find hidden just off the A3.

More blurry out-of-focus cameraphone pictures here.